Without Men

Yes yes, quite an unfair title I agree. But let’s just imagine the scenario once. Let’s say there was an alien attack or a genetic mutation due to some of those nuclear experiments conducted by U.S scientists & then all Y chromosome bearing creatures vanish from Earth! A big explosion & “poof!!!” they all disappear. Imagine life then…

• No more crimes:

Nearly half the crimes on Earth are caused directly or indirectly by women. Well, am not blaming us. It’s just the fact that we want our men to be rich enough to provide us with everything. That leads to greed & thus crime. Or vice-versa men want to impress us with their riches. Whatever be the reason, crime rises. And also there will be no dowry case, no rapes, no sexual harassment etc to bother about.

As I got an SMS recently: “If the world were to be ruled by women there would be no more wars. Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other!”

•  Population Under control:

This was is easy to comprehend. Well, no more males, means no more fake orgasms or irritating kids that we need to pretend to be fond of even when they spoil your dress by pissing or puking on you. Just in case some one needs a child well, it’s possible to synthesize self-replicating DNA now, isn’t it?

• Save That Trip to The Parlor:

I am a bit double-minded on this, I admit. Some of us go through this tedious process just so that we don’t depress our BFs. What would I not give to let my eyebrows go as wild & bushy as the moustache on Veerappan’s face or the hairs on my arms or legs grow, as tall as Savanna grasslands! Or roam around in my old faded half-pants & threadbare t-shirts.

Did I hear a moan? Oh well, some ladies would prefer to die than to even imagine this. We would wear the latest fashionable outfits and still be jealous if the other looks better.

•  No Ogling Eyes:

Yes, the best part. No more being with ogling eyes that seems to see right through your clothes like some evil-Superman. Now I can bend, kneel, sit, stand and breathe freely without adjusting my neckline &co, with every single movement of my body. I can roam about at 2am in the night, get drunk and still return home safe.

Last but not the least, I can finally pluck the courage to get into a swimsuit & learn swimming…about time!

P.S: To be continued…

(Yes I know am being totally biased & feminist or whatever. But look at the fun side!! Ok, there’s no fun being dead. But I promise my male readers a sequel to this: “Without Women” Till then be kind to me & give some good comments! :D)