What They Want..
It's nearly the end of Feb.Already the newspapers have started bearing ads of coaching institutes & colleges' are placing their admission details.It's the most hectic time of the year,with both parents & children remaining in a constant nervous state.
This lead me to think about what actually defines a career? I mean what is it that everyone generally looks for while making their career in a certain field.Why is that while some love engineering & medical,others prefer applied arts.Why is it common for a lawyer's son to be a lawyer & a doctor's son to be a doc?
The main question that arises here is,why isn't the child ever given the right to decide what he should study?
Well,that can be for many reasons...
- Most parents feel that their child is too inexperienced and the basis of choice is usually on his whims & fancies.The level of maturity in a kid is too less to actually make him stick to his decision.It's like buying a toy,playing with it for a few days & then discarding it.That's what parents fear the most,because in this case the expenditure isn't limited to just a few hundred or thousand bucks.And often the interim between playing and discarding makes a huge difference to their future.So it's up to the child to convince their parents that they are indeed serious regarding their choice.And that can't be done by words alone,one needs to actually show interest in the subject of their choice.
- Fear of "what people will say?" That's another factor (unique in India) that makes parents decide their children's career for them.What will my colleagues say when they hear my daughter is going for Arts ?! What will my neighbours say? What will my friends say? What will my family say?(Makes me wonder,what next?"What will the street dogs say????") Society does play an important role and true to our human nature we all strive to "fit in".But that doesn't mean we give up our dreams because they sound different?If that had been the case then none of the inventions would have materialized,no playwright would have added new words to our language & we would still have been living in caves & living on raw meat.It's rightly said -man cannot discover new lands unless he leaves sight of the shore!
- The tried & tested formula also plays an important role in career selection.Many feel it's better to go for something tried & tested.So when a child opts for something new or something a tad different,parents oppose it.That's indeed a mistake 'cos most of the time they themselves resist the new idea due to ignorance.Instead of learning about that field & talking to people who do know about it,what parents do is they completely shut it out and stick to old traditions.It's the case of lawyers making lawyers out of their wards & doctors running in the family.
Now lets see what actually career should mean to us.For most of us it means getting a good job that gives a fat paycheck.I am not preaching anything spiritual here (have given up the idea of being Agony aunt long back) but I feel that the job you do should cater to not only your financial needs but also to satisfy your aesthetic needs.By that I mean it should make you feel happy,give you a sense of achievement & contentment that yes! I have indeed done my best.
Imagine the scenario.Father returns tensed from the job,screams at the family,is rude to all,hardly makes any conversation, eats his dinner & then goes to sleep.Why? Well,bullied by boss at the office,he vents out his anger at home & to prove his authority as head of the family ends up bullying all.All sorts of anger,frustration & depression cases result from the mishaps at the workplace only.So what is the point of slogging so hard to get a job that in the end screws you???
Choosing a career is indeed a very important decision that would affect you in the long term.It needs proper guidance and time,so that you can recognize where your dreams lie..
So go ahead & make your avocation your vocation!!!